Lost From The Start
by KillerAkuma
Summary: He was lost from the start but no one knew until they truly saw what he was. Can they still call him a friend even though he's…


**A/N: Hello My Lovely Readers and a special thanks to RedAllen for the one-shot idea(Sorry if it's crap though) and don't forget to check out their profile.**

 **Please leave a review saying how I did and thanks for reading this.**

 _ **Warning, this story has a fair amount of time-skips and flicks through certain scenes, which means it played out the same way in the anime/manga.**_

* * *

 **Lost From The Start**

* * *

 _Little boy, little boy_

 _Don't listen to his sweet lies_

 _Little boy, little boy_

 _Close your dulling grey eyes_

* * *

 **Allen's POV:**

Gears appeared around my left eye as I stared at Eliade, the mummified soul that radiated a dark purple, floated above her. It was attached to her by a chain that glowed a faint purple. The akuma soul cried and screamed to be set free.

Lavi looked wide eyed at the soul as he gaged slightly, looking away only to stare at me. Wait not me, his single green eye staring above my head where my soul floated. "Allen…. You're an akuma?"

' _Lavi can see my soul… No, they weren't meant to find out about this… I didn't want them to know.'_

"I'm not an akuma… I'm," My gazed turned down as I smiled at him shakily, "I'm dead, I have been for five years."

Lavi stared at me with a wide green eye as he narrowed it before turning away, looking at Eliade. "You'll explain once where done here… Revert back to your other form Eliade!"

Count Kory starred wide eyed at Eliade or more likely the soul above her. Eliade stood and backed away from Kory, shifting into her level two form as man eating flowers broke through the floor, tangling both me and Lavi in there vines. Lavi started to struggle and curse at the flowers as one bit the top half of his body, he pride the flowers mouth open as I stared at the flowers.

"I love you! I love you! I love you!" I shouted and gently stroked the side of the flower in a loving manner. Lavi looked at me as I did this; he probably thought I lost my mind.

"These flowers won't harm you if you show them affection. They'll let you go if you do." Lavi just looked at me before he began to shout 'I love you' continuously. I laughed and waited till they sat me on the ground, still showing affection to them but I halted in what I was doing when I remembered that I would have to explain to Lavi why my soul is floating above me.

I shook my head as purple bubbles made their way over to us, many hitting the flowers causing them to shrivel up and die, the bubbles took all moisture that it touched. I looked over at Kory, seeing him get hit in the arm by one. One after another hit him until he floated down to the ground, swaying like paper or a leaf that has been dropped or hit by the wind.

Eliade bent down next to Kory, shifting back to her human form as she gently picked up Kory's moisture-less form. She smiled sadly as Kory's dried out form as he latched onto her neck, drinking her akuma oil/blood and killing her.

Kory returned to his normal form as he curled up on the ground, crying that he had killed the only one he loved and that he was a monster. "Kory! If you feel bad about her death become an exorcist and kill akuma so others won't suffer the same fate. So, don't shed another tear because Eliade would want you to move forward and keep doing so until you can't move anymore. Come fight alongside us, Kory."

I smiled brightly at Kory as he sniffled, tears running down his cheeks as he slowly nodded his head, slowly standing. "Now, common we have to get going."

"Can you meet me at the gate, I have something to do." Kory walked off as Lavi and I walked towards the gate.

Lavi broke the silence that surrounded the two of us as we waited at the gate. "So are you going to explain, Allen?"

My eyes shifted from him to my hands, fiddling with them. "Well, it started on the day Mana died and the Earl visited me…"

* * *

 _I sat curled up against Mana's grave, staring at the dark night sky as clouds cover most of darkening heavens, threatening to release snow onto the grounds below. I was transfixed with the sky that I didn't notice the creature standing behind Mana's grave until he spoke. "Good evening young boy. Do you wish for me to revive Mana Walker?"_

 _My eyes widened at the creature in front of me, not believing his words. They were too good to be true. "Revive him?"_

 _"Yes, all I need is your voice. Your voice alone can call back Mana Walker from you horrid God." The creature strode from behind the grave and in front of me, waving his arm as and akuma skeleton appeared from the ground beside him._

 _"Don't be shy, come on." I stared at the akuma skeleton, slowly pushing myself off the ground as I moved towards it slowly, taking a deep breath in as I shouted at the top of my little lungs._

 _"MANA!"_

 _Purple lighting struck the skeleton, blinding me as 'Mana' was engraved across the forehead of the skeleton. I shakily smiled and moved forward to hug the akuma, only to stop once it began to speak. "Allen… How could you? HOW COULD YOU TURN ME INTO AN AKUMA!"_

 _I flinched away from akuma Mana, not understanding why he was yelling at me. Had I done something wrong?_

 _"I CURSE YOU! I CURSE YOU, ALLEN!" Akuma Mana moved forwards and slashed the left side of my face, blood rushing from the newly formed wound. I cried out in pain as metal rope wrapped around me as akuma Mana loomed over my crying form._

 _Akuma Mana brought his bladed arm on my shoulder, it cutting deeply as I cried out in pain. The tears running from my eyes seemed endless as everything around me became blurry. My blood soaked into the ground turning it darker and making a small puddle of crimson as it began to gather around my form._

 _I cried out once more as my left arm glowed green, it mortifying into a giant metal claw that swatted akuma Mana a couple meters away from me. My dulling vision was stuck on akuma Mana's form as my giant claw dragged me towards him._

 _It rising up and coming down on akuma Mana but before he was destroyed, he spoke. "I love you, Allen. Please, destroy me. Destroy me!"_

 _I cried in agony and sorrow as I slowly made my way back over to Mana's grave, slouched against it as crimson was wiped onto his grave and the rest seeped into the ground._

 _My eyes grew heavy after what felt like hours, I closed my dulled grey eyes and I was pulled into this dark world, something was being whispered in my ear but I never knew what it was. I couldn't understand what it was saying._

 _The whispers turned into shouts, covering my ears as the shouting grew in volume until my eyes shot open and the voice was gone. I looked around and noticed something different, I looked down and saw my motionless form._

 _I gasped and moved away from my body until something kept me from moving any further, I looked down and saw that black chains that had a red glow around them and that kept me close to my body. They were wrapped around my legs and throat. My body looked different, I was a light grey figure with black long claws and on my left and it reach my shoulder then shifted into strange patterns._

 _This was strange and didn't feel right, I closed my eyes and opened them to feel tired but that faded when I blinked couple times. I slowly reached up and touched the left side of my face, my now white hair stained crimson in a couple places._

 _I looked up when someone stopped in front of me; I looked at him, Cross Marian._

* * *

"I realized a couple weeks after that day that I wasn't alive, I was simple a corpse that was wondering. I had died and the only thing keeping me like this is the curse that bond my soul to my body. If I didn't have this curse I wouldn't be here. I'm simply just a walking corpse that is stuck here until the curse is broken and or destroyed." I smiled slightly at Lavi as he was about to respond but was interrupted by an explosion, Kory had blown up the castle and the explosion had flung us back a couple feet.

Lavi and I started wide eyed at the burning and destroyed castle. Kory appeared in the flames and walked towards us, smiling. Lavi had his mouth hanging open as he stared at him. "Why did you destroy your castle?!"

"It held only everything my father did and not one bit of it was mine. I want something that's mine." He smiled brightly at the two of us as I returned the smile looking towards Lavi. Lavi gave a goofy grin towards Kory and we all walked back down the hill and returned to the village to board the train.

* * *

 _Young boy, young boy_

 _Protect what you hold dear_

 _Young boy, young boy_

 _They could just all disappear._

* * *

 **Allen's POV:**

We boarded the train and met up with Bookman, who we found sipping tea in the village. I pulled Lavi to the side as Kory and Bookman sat in the compartment. I narrowed my eyes a little at Lavi, who just stared at me. "Lavi can you promise me not to tell or let anyone else know? I don't want to let them know about my secret, yet."

"Allen, being a bookman is that I can't interfere so I won't tell anyone other than Bookman. So, don't fret over it." Lavi flashes a grin as he walked into the compartment, I following suit after a minute or two.

 **….. Suman's Betrayal – In The Forest …..**

I knelt crouched on the ground, struggling to keep my soul in my body for the time being as the chains that kept me in, groaned in protest. I breathed shallowly as I looked up and noticed Suman on the ground not very far away from me but he wasn't moving and you could barely see the small rise of his chest rising and falling. I slowly began to shuffle over to him, reaching out a hand and when I was about to touch his shoulder, a baritone voice was heard from behind me. "Tease."

My eyes widened as I watched purple butterflies eat away Susman's body, my breath caught in my throat as the butterflies fluttered around a bit before flying quickly over to the person had spoken and disappearing into his hands.

My mercury eyes narrowed at him as I hissed slightly under my breath as my innocence sent a shock of pain down my arm. The man standing in front of me was dressed formally in a black and white suit with a large top hat upon his head, he slowly strode over to me and sat on the ground in front of me.

He reached into his jacket and pulled a cigarette and lit it, breathing in the toxic chemical before exhaling into my face. I raised my useable hand and swatted the smoke out of my face, a smirk working its way onto his handsome features. "You wouldn't happen to be Allen Walker, would you?"

He paused for a second before a card floated up next to the stranger's head, "Cell Roron is this him?"

It seemed to screeched out a 'yes' as the man flashed a grin towards me before sticking his hand right through my chest, my eyes widening to the size of saucers as my eyes slowly looked down at the hand and up to look him dead in the eyes. The man's voice lulled in my ears as he slowly moved his hand back and clasped it gently around my beating heart. "I could rip your heart right out of your chest."

I stared at him blankly, if this was how I was going to die then so be it. At least my friends would morn over my death this time that is only if they knew what was residing just under the skin. The man blinked a couple times before chuckling and removing his hand, "No, I won't do that. I don't want to get my gloves dirty. Tell me shounen, what does it feel like to be on the losing side of this Holy War?"

"I honestly don't know what you're talking about. I cannot see how this can be called a Holy War. For what can be Holy in the slaughter of innocent women and children, the breaking up of peaceful homes and the death and maiming of thousands people and comrades," I narrowed my eyes slightly as I brought my left hand across his face, "But I know in the end, it'll never be a losing battle till I can no longer protect the ones I love!"

His cigarette was knocked out of his mouth as his hat fell off his head and landed on the ground next to him. He narrowed his eyes and glared at me out the corner of them, his golden eyes flashing in anger as he swiftly grabbed my wrist and twisted it to an odd angle, a loud snapping sound echoing in my ears as a shout of pain pasted my lips, hugging it to my chest in a protective manner. "Better not try that again, shounen."

The man ran his fingers through his hair as he sighed, looking off to the side before looking back at me, "I believe I should kill you slowly, so I'll put one of these – Tease – in your chest to eat a hole in your heart. A slow and painful death."

One of his Tease appeared in the palm of his hand as he phased it through my chest, a sharp pain caused my eyes to widened as a strong hand wrapped around my shoulder and began to pull until a scream tore from my throat as he ripped my arms off. I fell backwards as a trail of blood ran down my chin, looking at my arm as it lied a couple feet from my reach, the sparks of the dark matter coming from his hands as he destroyed the arm and extracted the raw innocence from it. He picked it up into his hand as he closed his fist around it, a green flash being seen seep from his hand as he opened it and dust blew away in the wind.

"Now for the other piece." The man made a move to collect Suman's from the ground but wasn't able to because of my words that my trusted companion listened to.

"Tim take the innocence to my friends… Go!" I coughed as my vision darkened slightly from the hole in my heart, I looked towards the man as he laughed slightly.

"Nice going Shounen, but it's not going to save your friends… Farewell, Allen Walker." The man reached down and took one of the buttons on my exorcist coat as he disappeared into the dark. My mercury eyes stared at the moon as it got larger, my breath slowed as I was forced out of my body. I watched my body slowly still as faint footsteps were heard in the distance as well as the cracking of the chain on my neck, it breaking and clattering to the ground.

I gasped as I stared at it, the ones on my feet still tightly bound there as I grit my teeth and watched as the weird looking girl that I later on found out who was the Guardian of the European Branch, Fou.

 **….. Noah's Ark …..**

"NO! LAVI! CHAOJI!"

I screamed as I clasped onto Lavi's hammer only for it to crumble in my hand and fall into the blue void of the ark. I gripped onto the sword of exorcism as I glared fire at the Earl, I cried out as I ran towards him with my sword, only for Cross to stop me with the Grave of Maria. My shoulder bled as I forcefully climbed up and walked over to Cross. Glaring at him as my sword disappeared and was replaced with my black left arm. Lenalee leant on Cross crying as her shoulder shook in shock and despair from losing more of her ' _family_ '.

I looked away from her as I looked at my master who was talking to Tim, his gaze landed on me as he opened a golden portal and we disappeared into the area where the Akuma Egg was located. "Tim, take Allen to the _room_."

Tim flew over to me, opening another portal except I didn't enter it willing, my master pushed me threw it and Tim took me to this room.

A couple second later I opened my eyes to a completely white room, something stirred in my being and began to push my soul outside my body so it could take over. I narrowed my eyes as I got up and looked towards the white piano, my curse shifting and causing pain to flash throw my chest and me to cry out in pain and surprise. "W-what?"

"Idiot Apprentice, hurry up and play the piano!" His master voice shouted from the other side of the communicator that was attached to his ear, nearly deafening me.

"I can't pla-" My words were cut off when I was pushed out of my being, the darker soul that lurked in my body rising to the surface as he sung out lowly to Cross. The single chain keeping me to this body slowly cracking but not showing any other side of breaking, the other chains having broken until this one was left.

"Marian, thanks for keeping my host alive, well half alive anyway," A darker and deeper melodic voice past through my lips as my body moved on its own over to the piano, position my fingers on the keys has he began to play softly, "I'll restore the Arc for you because you can have the egg and I'll take the Arc."

"Fourteenth, what do you mean I only kept the host half alive?" Cross spoke seriously as smashing noises were heard from his side of the communicator.

"Isn't it obvious? The host of this body is only hanging by a chain that's cracking and when it does, he'll die, and this time he won't come back." The Fourteenth – Neah – looked towards me and grinned as he continued to play the piano skilfully, I narrowed my eyes at him as I tried to force my way back into control, failing miserably.

Cross grunted as he mumbled something on the other side of the communicator, grumbling through in it as crashing noises were heard in the background, "Just hurry up, I'm kinda dying out here."

"Such the charmer you are Marian…" The Fourteenth finished the song as he made sure the communicator was off before looking towards me, smiling faintly as he gently pulled on the chain that was keeping me here, "If you want, I can end you now and you won't have to deal with the pain that's going to appear in the future, just say the word and I'll break this chain."

I glared at him as I held onto the chain, like it was, which it was, my life line. "No, I won't give up until I can't walk any further, then this body is yours when that happens."

The Fourteenth chuckled and released hold of the body as he disappeared back into the deepest part of my mind, but not before grinning and singing out, "I'll be waiting~"

I glared at the wall as I shook my head and opened a door to this room, sighing as Cross walked into the room and ordered me to explain what the Fourteenth meant. I slowly began to explain the same story I told Lavi months ago.

* * *

 _This is not a whim,_

 _So destroy what's left of him_

 _Break the chain that keeps him tame_

 _And watch him disappear into the far off plain._

* * *

 **Allen's POV:**

After Road and Tyki saved me from that _thing_ , I made my way through a crumbling ark gate which lead me to a field, the middle of a wheat field. The wind rustling it as I made my way to a barely standing tree. I knelt next to it as the curse that kept me to this earth was untwining from my body. The red glowing chain was cracking as the fourteenth's soul slowly began to awaken. When the fourteenth woke up the chain would break and I would pass on.

I slowly made my way over to the tree, leaning against it as I close my eyes and open them to see the full moon bearing down on me. A sigh left my lips as I fell to my knees, tears weld in my mercury eyes as I looked down at my beaten and bony form. The binding on my left arm had been removed by Tyki as we escaped together, Road in my arms as Timcampy carried us.

I should have thanked Tyki instead of yelling at him.

Should have let him destroy my arm.

Should have let him get rid of the thing that kept the fourteenth back.

Should of let the Fourteenth destroy the chain on the Arc.

Should have given up on life when I died.

But I didn't.

I didn't so I could live longer and hopefully say a goodbye to all the ones I love and have yet to love. Even those who are the enemy. I want to live – to stay in control – long enough so I can end the show I had started with the Earl.

I want to close the curtains for myself.

I narrowed my eyes up at the moon as I pushed myself to my feet. A pained hiss left my lips as my innocent arm burned as the fourteenth whirled inside of my body. I ignored the pain as I stood tall and looked into the distance.

"I won't give up till my curtain has fallen and _HE_ has taken over."

* * *

 **FIN~!**


End file.
